12.31.2005
12.27.2005
brother means purple...
not even two minutes ago...
this doofus that i know was having a conversation with someone else about p.t. cruisers...which happen to be the ugliest cars on the planet after yugos...they were discussing the worst points of the little car...and he was trying to pull me into the conversation...
i was doing an excellent job of just nodding and smiling and appearing politely interested in this dead end exchange...when he makes this comment:
"You know, I hate the damn things. Every time I go to New Orleans, I get stuck renting one. The last time I went I got stuck with one that was a Brother Car - It was purple."
Knowing full well, the black and white (insert racial, here) implications of the statement, i innocently turned around and looked him right in the eye and asked, "What's a Brother Car?"
His response, "You know - it was purple."
insert crickets, here...
As I knitted my eyebrows into a clueless expression...he was saved from sticking his foot farther down his throat by the other participant in the conversation...
"I didn't know brother meant purple."
neither did i...neither did i...
this doofus that i know was having a conversation with someone else about p.t. cruisers...which happen to be the ugliest cars on the planet after yugos...they were discussing the worst points of the little car...and he was trying to pull me into the conversation...
i was doing an excellent job of just nodding and smiling and appearing politely interested in this dead end exchange...when he makes this comment:
"You know, I hate the damn things. Every time I go to New Orleans, I get stuck renting one. The last time I went I got stuck with one that was a Brother Car - It was purple."
Knowing full well, the black and white (insert racial, here) implications of the statement, i innocently turned around and looked him right in the eye and asked, "What's a Brother Car?"
His response, "You know - it was purple."
insert crickets, here...
As I knitted my eyebrows into a clueless expression...he was saved from sticking his foot farther down his throat by the other participant in the conversation...
"I didn't know brother meant purple."
neither did i...neither did i...
12.24.2005
12.22.2005
people for the ethical treatment of the beard daughters...
my sister and i are circulating a petition...we are seeking support for my mom cooking a FRESH christmas dinner...seems as if the chick was watching some cooking show and got a VERY BAD IDEA to freeze thanksgiving leftovers and re-heat them for christmas dinner...needless to say...the beard daughters are not happy campers and we are threatening to boycott christmas at the homestead and instead set up a picket line...
however...before we resort to such drastic measures...we are hoping 100 or so signatures will help us in our negotiations with our mother...
my sister and i are already in the contingency planning stage for my mom's retaliation in the form of an expected strike for new year's dinner...so...if you guys have any suggestions for where our family could have new year's dinner, i welcome them...'cause...my dad's gotta eat...
my mom's probably going kill us...but hey...it's worth it...
however...before we resort to such drastic measures...we are hoping 100 or so signatures will help us in our negotiations with our mother...
my sister and i are already in the contingency planning stage for my mom's retaliation in the form of an expected strike for new year's dinner...so...if you guys have any suggestions for where our family could have new year's dinner, i welcome them...'cause...my dad's gotta eat...
my mom's probably going kill us...but hey...it's worth it...
12.21.2005
today...i almost killed a man...
I came down the stairs of my apartment and walked across the street to the '06 Suburban that Enterprise Rental is so graciously providing me at the expense of Victoria Insurance. As I was crossing the street, I noticed an older woman with a cane leaving one of the houses on the next block. It was obvious that she was heading to the bus stop to wait for the MARTA.
Being the compassionate individual that I can sometimes be, I could not pass this woman on the street without offering her a ride - to the train station, to her house, somewhere, anywhere - I just couldn't pass her by. As it turns out, she wanted to go downtown.
After letting her off near the Five Points MARTA station, I proceed east on Marietta Street to get on 75/85South. I HATE driving in this part of downtown because dodging jaywalkers is like playing a video game. As I was sitting at the light at Marietta and Peachtree (careful NOT to make any turns, because as it cost me a $105 fine last year to learn that the sign that says NO TURNS really means NO TURNS), a guy crossing the street was eating a Three Musketeers candy bar. It pissed me off to watch him throw the candy wrapper on the ground. I mean, for real, dude - couldn't you have just put the wrapper in your pocket until you passed by one of the 4,000 trash cans downtown? Oh well, I guess his thoughtlessness is just one of those things that gives the City of Atlanta street cleaners something to do.
Anyway, the light turns green and I began to proceed down Marietta (after not having turned at the NO TURN sign). I'm listening to Si-Man and them on 102.5 and smiling because all of the lights are green and if you're familiar with driving in downtown Atlanta, you KNOW that having all greens is a miracle that means that God is smiling on you. By this time, I have probably reached a speed of about 35 mph. Just as I move into the right lane near the Peachtree Center intersection, some guy just steps out into the damn intersection without even looking my way. As I swerved left to avoid hitting him, the sound of my squealing tires caught his attention and he jumped back up on the curb. I am thankful to God that there was no one in the left lane. OR...I would have wrecked Enterprise Rental's '06 Surburban...the one that I didn't buy the full coverage insurance for.
Lessons for the Day: No good deed goes unpunished. There are certifiable idiots just roaming the streets of downtown Atlanta. Near misses cause one hell of an adrenaline rush.
And a closing thought...I am thinking about how the scene would have been different if it would have been a hit and not a near miss. I wonder if people realize how one moment of inattention has the power to end and change lives.
I am also wondering if I can find that dude and sue him for the 13 seconds of extreme distress and resulting mental anguish that he caused me.
Being the compassionate individual that I can sometimes be, I could not pass this woman on the street without offering her a ride - to the train station, to her house, somewhere, anywhere - I just couldn't pass her by. As it turns out, she wanted to go downtown.
After letting her off near the Five Points MARTA station, I proceed east on Marietta Street to get on 75/85South. I HATE driving in this part of downtown because dodging jaywalkers is like playing a video game. As I was sitting at the light at Marietta and Peachtree (careful NOT to make any turns, because as it cost me a $105 fine last year to learn that the sign that says NO TURNS really means NO TURNS), a guy crossing the street was eating a Three Musketeers candy bar. It pissed me off to watch him throw the candy wrapper on the ground. I mean, for real, dude - couldn't you have just put the wrapper in your pocket until you passed by one of the 4,000 trash cans downtown? Oh well, I guess his thoughtlessness is just one of those things that gives the City of Atlanta street cleaners something to do.
Anyway, the light turns green and I began to proceed down Marietta (after not having turned at the NO TURN sign). I'm listening to Si-Man and them on 102.5 and smiling because all of the lights are green and if you're familiar with driving in downtown Atlanta, you KNOW that having all greens is a miracle that means that God is smiling on you. By this time, I have probably reached a speed of about 35 mph. Just as I move into the right lane near the Peachtree Center intersection, some guy just steps out into the damn intersection without even looking my way. As I swerved left to avoid hitting him, the sound of my squealing tires caught his attention and he jumped back up on the curb. I am thankful to God that there was no one in the left lane. OR...I would have wrecked Enterprise Rental's '06 Surburban...the one that I didn't buy the full coverage insurance for.
Lessons for the Day: No good deed goes unpunished. There are certifiable idiots just roaming the streets of downtown Atlanta. Near misses cause one hell of an adrenaline rush.
And a closing thought...I am thinking about how the scene would have been different if it would have been a hit and not a near miss. I wonder if people realize how one moment of inattention has the power to end and change lives.
I am also wondering if I can find that dude and sue him for the 13 seconds of extreme distress and resulting mental anguish that he caused me.
12.16.2005
justice for miss janet...
Killer gets life term
A homeless man was sentenced to life in prison after being found guilty of the rape and murder of a homeless Riverdale woman in January.
Janice Cunningham, 50, was found sexually assaulted and strangled behind a boarded-up convenience store along busy Ga. 85. Henry Sheffield was arrested for murder at a candlelight vigil for Cunningham days after her death.
Sheffield, 35, was convicted Wednesday in Clayton County Superior Court and sentenced to life in prison.
Denise Leary of Dallas, Texas, one of Cunningham's siblings, called the crime a "senseless tragedy." "We lost a sister, her children lost a mother; we can't get her back," Leary said. "And here's a young person who will spend the rest of his life in prison, so if he has family, they've lost him too. The cycle continues."
A homeless man was sentenced to life in prison after being found guilty of the rape and murder of a homeless Riverdale woman in January.
Janice Cunningham, 50, was found sexually assaulted and strangled behind a boarded-up convenience store along busy Ga. 85. Henry Sheffield was arrested for murder at a candlelight vigil for Cunningham days after her death.
Sheffield, 35, was convicted Wednesday in Clayton County Superior Court and sentenced to life in prison.
Denise Leary of Dallas, Texas, one of Cunningham's siblings, called the crime a "senseless tragedy." "We lost a sister, her children lost a mother; we can't get her back," Leary said. "And here's a young person who will spend the rest of his life in prison, so if he has family, they've lost him too. The cycle continues."
12.04.2005
114 tortuous and wasted minutes of my life...
hustle and flow...the story of an old a$$ broke pimp wanna be who dreams (everybody gotta have a dream) of becoming a rapper (i swear, every-damn-body wanna shuffle and grin for the masses)..who glorifies his bottom bitch (and not the white girl who is doing all the work, but a seemingly half retarded VERY pregnant chick who's single most meaningful moment in her life has been singing a lame-A$$ hook on a DEMO).
he runs into a upstanding employed young brother with a career, a wife and a home...he brings two hoes into this man's house and leaves them on the couch with his wife while the broke pimp is rapping in the kitchen to a $5 casio about slapping bitches...and after that lame a$$ performance...this good church going brother starts hanging out in at the pimp hotel jeopardizing his relationship and brings along opie?!?!?! gtfoh...get the f*ck outta here...
and i could go on...but i ain't getting paid and then i guess this is all make believe...
underlying themes...
er'body got a hustle...you gotta have a dream...going to jail will cause an increase in airplay (look at gucci mane)...and it's good to have a few good hoes in your corner...
one sentence review: very little hustle, horrible flow - nicca get a job...
he runs into a upstanding employed young brother with a career, a wife and a home...he brings two hoes into this man's house and leaves them on the couch with his wife while the broke pimp is rapping in the kitchen to a $5 casio about slapping bitches...and after that lame a$$ performance...this good church going brother starts hanging out in at the pimp hotel jeopardizing his relationship and brings along opie?!?!?! gtfoh...get the f*ck outta here...
and i could go on...but i ain't getting paid and then i guess this is all make believe...
underlying themes...
er'body got a hustle...you gotta have a dream...going to jail will cause an increase in airplay (look at gucci mane)...and it's good to have a few good hoes in your corner...
one sentence review: very little hustle, horrible flow - nicca get a job...
it's just like dasK says...
life is FULL of risk...
and if you're not taking risks...you're not living...
recently...i took a risk on something...and sadly...it did not turn out the way that i had hoped...but you know what?
it's okay that it didn't turn out how i'd planned...it was not a great loss as i was not totally invested...instead...it was just a letdown...a disappointment...
and letdowns and disappointments are a part of living...L&D's make come-ups and victories all the more fabulous...
so...i said all of that to say...i am thankful for this disappointment...it let's me know that i am taking risks and THAT allows me to live a life overflowing...
and if you're not taking risks...you're not living...
recently...i took a risk on something...and sadly...it did not turn out the way that i had hoped...but you know what?
it's okay that it didn't turn out how i'd planned...it was not a great loss as i was not totally invested...instead...it was just a letdown...a disappointment...
and letdowns and disappointments are a part of living...L&D's make come-ups and victories all the more fabulous...
so...i said all of that to say...i am thankful for this disappointment...it let's me know that i am taking risks and THAT allows me to live a life overflowing...
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