12.27.2005

brother means purple...

not even two minutes ago...

this doofus that i know was having a conversation with someone else about p.t. cruisers...which happen to be the ugliest cars on the planet after yugos...they were discussing the worst points of the little car...and he was trying to pull me into the conversation...

i was doing an excellent job of just nodding and smiling and appearing politely interested in this dead end exchange...when he makes this comment:

"You know, I hate the damn things. Every time I go to New Orleans, I get stuck renting one. The last time I went I got stuck with one that was a Brother Car - It was purple."

Knowing full well, the black and white (insert racial, here) implications of the statement, i innocently turned around and looked him right in the eye and asked, "What's a Brother Car?"

His response, "You know - it was purple."

insert crickets, here...

As I knitted my eyebrows into a clueless expression...he was saved from sticking his foot farther down his throat by the other participant in the conversation...

"I didn't know brother meant purple."

neither did i...neither did i...

12.24.2005

longing...

this morning...i lay in bed...alone...making love to the man in my dreams...

sighs...

12.22.2005

people for the ethical treatment of the beard daughters...

my sister and i are circulating a petition...we are seeking support for my mom cooking a FRESH christmas dinner...seems as if the chick was watching some cooking show and got a VERY BAD IDEA to freeze thanksgiving leftovers and re-heat them for christmas dinner...needless to say...the beard daughters are not happy campers and we are threatening to boycott christmas at the homestead and instead set up a picket line...

however...before we resort to such drastic measures...we are hoping 100 or so signatures will help us in our negotiations with our mother...

my sister and i are already in the contingency planning stage for my mom's retaliation in the form of an expected strike for new year's dinner...so...if you guys have any suggestions for where our family could have new year's dinner, i welcome them...'cause...my dad's gotta eat...

my mom's probably going kill us...but hey...it's worth it...

12.21.2005

today...i almost killed a man...

I came down the stairs of my apartment and walked across the street to the '06 Suburban that Enterprise Rental is so graciously providing me at the expense of Victoria Insurance. As I was crossing the street, I noticed an older woman with a cane leaving one of the houses on the next block. It was obvious that she was heading to the bus stop to wait for the MARTA.

Being the compassionate individual that I can sometimes be, I could not pass this woman on the street without offering her a ride - to the train station, to her house, somewhere, anywhere - I just couldn't pass her by. As it turns out, she wanted to go downtown.

After letting her off near the Five Points MARTA station, I proceed east on Marietta Street to get on 75/85South. I HATE driving in this part of downtown because dodging jaywalkers is like playing a video game. As I was sitting at the light at Marietta and Peachtree (careful NOT to make any turns, because as it cost me a $105 fine last year to learn that the sign that says NO TURNS really means NO TURNS), a guy crossing the street was eating a Three Musketeers candy bar. It pissed me off to watch him throw the candy wrapper on the ground. I mean, for real, dude - couldn't you have just put the wrapper in your pocket until you passed by one of the 4,000 trash cans downtown? Oh well, I guess his thoughtlessness is just one of those things that gives the City of Atlanta street cleaners something to do.

Anyway, the light turns green and I began to proceed down Marietta (after not having turned at the NO TURN sign). I'm listening to Si-Man and them on 102.5 and smiling because all of the lights are green and if you're familiar with driving in downtown Atlanta, you KNOW that having all greens is a miracle that means that God is smiling on you. By this time, I have probably reached a speed of about 35 mph. Just as I move into the right lane near the Peachtree Center intersection, some guy just steps out into the damn intersection without even looking my way. As I swerved left to avoid hitting him, the sound of my squealing tires caught his attention and he jumped back up on the curb.
I am thankful to God that there was no one in the left lane. OR...I would have wrecked Enterprise Rental's '06 Surburban...the one that I didn't buy the full coverage insurance for.

Lessons for the Day: No good deed goes unpunished. There are certifiable idiots just roaming the streets of downtown Atlanta. Near misses cause one hell of an adrenaline rush.

And a closing thought...I am thinking about how the scene would have been different if it would have been a hit and not a near miss. I wonder if people realize how one moment of inattention has the power to end and change lives.


I am also wondering if I can find that dude and sue him for the 13 seconds of extreme distress and resulting mental anguish that he caused me.

12.16.2005

justice for miss janet...

Killer gets life term

A homeless man was sentenced to life in prison after being found guilty of the rape and murder of a homeless Riverdale woman in January.

Janice Cunningham, 50, was found sexually assaulted and strangled behind a boarded-up convenience store along busy Ga. 85. Henry Sheffield was arrested for murder at a candlelight vigil for Cunningham days after her death.

Sheffield, 35, was convicted Wednesday in Clayton County Superior Court and sentenced to life in prison.

Denise Leary of Dallas, Texas, one of Cunningham's siblings, called the crime a "senseless tragedy." "We lost a sister, her children lost a mother; we can't get her back," Leary said. "And here's a young person who will spend the rest of his life in prison, so if he has family, they've lost him too. The cycle continues."

12.04.2005

114 tortuous and wasted minutes of my life...

hustle and flow...the story of an old a$$ broke pimp wanna be who dreams (everybody gotta have a dream) of becoming a rapper (i swear, every-damn-body wanna shuffle and grin for the masses)..who glorifies his bottom bitch (and not the white girl who is doing all the work, but a seemingly half retarded VERY pregnant chick who's single most meaningful moment in her life has been singing a lame-A$$ hook on a DEMO).

he runs into a upstanding employed young brother with a career, a wife and a home...he brings two hoes into this man's house and leaves them on the couch with his wife while the broke pimp is rapping in the kitchen to a $5 casio about slapping bitches...and after that lame a$$ performance...this good church going brother starts hanging out in at the pimp hotel jeopardizing his relationship and brings along opie?!?!?! gtfoh...get the f*ck outta here...

and i could go on...but i ain't getting paid and then i guess this is all make believe...

underlying themes...

er'body got a hustle...you gotta have a dream...going to jail will cause an increase in airplay (look at gucci mane)...and it's good to have a few good hoes in your corner...

one sentence review: very little hustle, horrible flow - nicca get a job...

it's just like dasK says...

life is FULL of risk...

and if you're not taking risks...you're not living...

recently...i took a risk on something...and sadly...it did not turn out the way that i had hoped...but you know what?

it's okay that it didn't turn out how i'd planned...it was not a great loss as i was not totally invested...instead...it was just a letdown...a disappointment...

and letdowns and disappointments are a part of living...L&D's make come-ups and victories all the more fabulous...

so...i said all of that to say...i am thankful for this disappointment...it let's me know that i am taking risks and THAT allows me to live a life overflowing...

11.30.2005

the end of a day...

well...you see what time it is...and i am winding down my day...

i am satisfied with the day that i had...not because anything special happened in it...all things told...it was rather mundane...but...it was a day in which i felt ALL the way alive...

old school woke me this morning with a phone call from seattle...it's nice to hear an amazing voice at the start of your day...i made it into the office around 900a...and arrived at a desk with practically no work on it and an email in box that was fairly empty...

by 1100a...i was in the chiropractor's office...getting my treatment...funny...until my rear-ending...i truly could not appreciate how real and consuming back pain is...at its worst...it really shuts you down and leaves you incapable of coherent thought and is paralyzing...for those who suffer chronic back pain...my deepest sympathies...i must say that i look forward to my complete recovery...and my pain and suffering settlement...insert big grin here...the thing about it though...with the pain that i've been experiencing...it will be worth every penny...

i left the office a bit early and made it home today in time to miss the first 15 minutes of oprah...jamie foxx was today's guest...peep this...i am a fan...and have been for ages...and those of you who are also real fans...know exactly what i mean when i say 'peep this'...

took a nap after oprah...and made it to my last regular season softball game for the year...we won...it was a painful victory for me...with the whole back thing that i've got going on...but...i am determined not to let this temporary thing stop my life...and delighted to end the regular season with a victory...

got home around 930p and did some cleaning...i'm still doing that deep cleaning that my apartment needs from when lana and espy had the attic re-insulated...i haven't been feeling like doing the cleaning all at one time...so...i've been doing it when the mood strikes me...the truth of the matter is...i would love to have been able to pay someone to do this...but...hey...in time...i'll get it done...it's really nothing more than dusting and wiping down EVERY exposed surface in the apartment...too much to just leave until my quarterly spring cleaning...but not that kind of unbearable unclean that you can't live in...

and now...i am at the end of my day...my face is washed...my teeth are brushed...and jay leno just went off...i am about to go to bed with a plan for my day tomorrow which includes my 2.5 mile walk...an early hair appointment...some time in the office tomorrow...with a stop by nina's to get my brows shaped before i head to my part time job tomorrow night...

but first...i think i'll give old school a call...it's still early on the west coast...

and in the fashion of my late friend and co-worker joseph tamulis...T-T-F-N...(translation - ta-ta for now)...

11.18.2005

first thoat chop...

thoat chop to the drive thru chick at mcdonalds in hapeville this morning...for not telling me when i placed my order that they were out of mcgriddles...no...she just HAD to let me sit for five minutes behind three cars and wait UNTIL I GET TO THE WINDOW to pay to tell me that they didn't have no d@mn mcgriddles...

and you know...i'm not ticked because they were out of mcgriddles...i promise...i could have done without the calories anyway...i'm actually not even THAT ticked because she WAITED TO TELL ME...

what kills me about the whole d@mn thing...there wasn't a blasted thing i could do about it...what could i say?...

OH...YOU GONE MAKE ME A MCGRIDDLE!!!!....

yrb...

11.17.2005

updates...

because i was audacious enough to call tazzee out after not posting for nearly a month my damn self...

i am finally updating my blog...

so much has been going on in my life...

my birthday passed...i got an ipod...my truck was rear ended...i got whiplash...i've been cutting calories and walking at least 2.5 miles each weekday morning and 5 miles each weekend morning for the last two weeks...(or at least until previously mentioned car accident)...and i got 10 pounds lighter...

in the new tradition of my dearest icey...i've actually got a few throat chops to throw down...but each one will probably be a seperate post...so i'll get back with the chops...

and that is all that i am inspired to write for now...

i'll holla back...'cause unlike ms. stefani...i am a holla back girl...